Emotion - That which Moves.
(Emotions are the things which run our world. They not only form our inner world, but they also create the events and situations we encounter every day...Emotions, Part 1)
Recurring Patterns; The Energetic Pattern of Bullying and How to Deal with It.
Because our feelings create our world, moment by moment, there's no-where we can run to in order to escape our recurring problems; they happen everywhere we are, because they originate from a fear we have within us. So whenever we try to run away, we just re-create our imperfect world all over again! Bullying, by individuals or by groups, follows the same pattern. It relies on separation, the bully picks on someone who seems different in some way. If that person experiences fear at this separation, that's the reward, and the encouragement needed to carry on. The only way to deal with it is first to confront the fear within yourself, and then refuse to follow those thoughts with any emotional energy. The Law of Emotional Resonance works all the time, in every one. Whatever we feel resonates within the field of energy which surrounds us all, and brings us more of the same feeling.
To illustrate: as I'm writing this, on the TV is a story about a man who had a nervous breakdown after being bullied at work. He worked as a broker in the Trading Room of a City firm - probably one of the most insane and macho environments anyone could choose to work in! However, the breakdown he suffered happened when he was on holiday in the Carribean. He wanted to get away from the pressure of this constant undermining bullying at work. While he was in a bar there, enjoying a quiet drink, thousands of miles away from the trading floor, three of his work colleagues walked in! They immediately shouted out their cruel nickname for him and some abusive remarks, and he collapsed, an emotional wreck. (He's still unable to work, two years on.) The story of the bullies clearly shows the Law of Emotional Resonance at work. Strong feelings bring more of the same - good or bad!
Depression results from feeling powerless. We need to know what we can DO in such a situation. The thing we can always do, no matter where we are or what's happening to us, is choose to stay calm, and refuse to give emotional energy to fear or panic. Once we know we can choose what to feel, and change our 'instinctive' reaction of fear by deliberately thinking a positive thought, or by blessing our tormentors, we need never feel powerless again! Feelings create, not just our present experience, but also our future.
Bullying is an energetic relationship which relies on a repeated pattern of response from the victim. Bullies like to feel powerful. So the emotional response from the victim is the reward of the bully, and without it, the bullying behaviour stops. By understanding the energetic process, we can change our feelings about ourselves, which is the crux of the whole matter. It takes a firm decision to stop the strong negative emotion which fuels this relationship. Someone who's being bullied is responding with self-doubt, shame, fear - emotions which are vibrationally resonating with the bully's secret feelings about themselves. A perfect energetic match!
The step we need to take to stop bullying is the same as to solve any other problem - to stay calm in the face of perceived danger, and refuse to allow our emotional energy to follow our fear-based thoughts. It's actually only the first, panic-driven response that has to be resisted. This is enough to break the pattern that's been set up. Fear inspires panic - the opposite of fear is love, which inspires calm and confidence. So to stop the bullying, we need to resolve to stay calm, and then choose some thought connected to love. That can be love for ourself, or love for the bully - remember, the idea is to change the bullying behaviour - blessing someone changes the relationship between you immediately! When confronted with the bully, have your ammunition ready, your plan worked out. Remember, every time you feel strong fear, you're creating another situation for yourself where that will be your emotional reaction.
Deciding to keep calm is the first step of the Applying Love method, and works on any problem, no matter what it is,
From the point of view of the bully, when you refuse to feel fear, the reward for his or her behaviour has been taken away. From the point of view of Love, bullies are a way of testing our self-belief; continued bullying, I think, can be seen as a sign that we have a weakness in it! By dealing with that weakness, we are stronger after the experience. That weakness will hamper you all your life if you don't deal with it when you're being bullied. Look on the experience as a helpful opportunity to deal with fear! The experience of this kind of Fear is worse than whatever we're afraid of; it robs us of our self-respect. I've stood up to bullies twice; both times, I first resolved to confront my own fear; and as soon as I refused to act in the way they expected, the bullies backed down, and we ended up making friends! The energetic patterns we set up and follow have inevitable consequences - everyone is bound by them, whether they know about them or not. All problems can be solved by setting up new vibrations - by taking control of our thoughts and our feelings.
Other articles:Emotions, part 1 (including the Law of Emotional Resonance.)The Applying Love Method the way to solve ALL problems! Problems What are they - and why does Applying Love work? Music for Healing including examples of music composed with Love for healing.
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